Ah, What's In A Name
by ASGT and Kat Maximoff
Summary: The story of how the Acolytes got their name. One shot.


** Ah, what's in a name?  
  
A little something that just popped into my head... Well, it popped a while ago, but was just recently re-popped.**  
  
"All of us, together, the greatest team of mutants ever assembled will restore the world where it should have been the entire time. MUTANT SUPREMACY!" Magneto yelled, glancing over his troups. Remy LeBeau, Gambit. St. John Allerdyce, Pyro. Piotr Rasputin, Colossus. And Victor Creed, Sabertooth. Such a jolly team.  
  
"Hey, mate," Pyro piped up. "What are you gonna call us?"  
  
"Call you?" This idea hadn't even occurred to Erik. Yes, Charles' crew were the X-Men, and the Brotherhood was the Brotherhood. Why shouldn't his group of mutants have a name?  
  
"Oui, homme, we've got to have a name if we're going to strike fear in the hearts of men," Remy added.  
  
"Da, you should," Piotr, the soft spoken one added. Victor did not add to this conversation, as he was busy off chasing Wolverine, which was always a good thing in Erik's opinion.  
  
"Do any of you have suggestions?" Magneto asked, eyeing them all suspiciously.  
  
"How about the Super Friends!" John asked, striking a pose. Magneto shot him a look that said 'What-the-hell? No-way!' So John tried again. "Magneto and Friends?" Magneto glowred.  
  
"Something tells Remy that he don't wanna have any thing to do wit a team called anything friends. The homme wants to strike fear into the hearts of men, " Remy said. And John noted it. "He was tryin' t' make a point," Remy said sternly.  
  
"Then why are we not the Evil People of DOOM!?" John asked.  
  
"Because maybe it was taken!" Magneto snapped.  
  
"Oh," John bit his lip. Since the boys were getting nowhere, Magneto turned to Piotr for possibilities.  
  
"Colossus, do you have any ideas?"  
  
"Well, I've always liked the color red [1]... So... Why not having us be the Red Rutheless Killers?"  
  
"Doesn't exactly roll off the tongue now, does it?" John asked.  
  
"Point exactly! Why not having us be the Titans!" John suggested. Not waiting for anyone to give an opinion on this, he spoke again. "An' if we get junior members, they can be the Teen Titans!"  
  
"No." Magneto said.  
  
"Why not de Rebelin' Rebels?" Remy asked, placing his index finger on his chin.  
  
"Redundant and retarded," Magneto replied point blankly.  
  
"Don't call people retarded you fag! My brother's mentally retarded!" John said, looking angrily at Magneto, but Magneto just made a motion like he was brushing dirt off his shoulder. John sat back down.  
  
"Do not use that word either, unless referring to cigarettes," Magneto said sternly.  
  
"Why not, boss?" John asked.  
  
"Because my son is gay." The group looked at Magneto and blinked a few times. Then, all together, realization dawned on them.  
  
"Oh!"  
  
"How about de Loser Squad?" Remy looked at his cohorts.  
  
"I shant have my team be named the 'Loser Squad,' it makes us sound like... well... losers!"  
  
"It's reverse psychology," Remy explained. "They think that we are awful at this, and then they go into de battle thinking that they'll be getting off easy..." As tempting as it was, Magneto had to turn it down.  
  
"Maraders?" Piotr suggested.  
  
"You read too much," Remy replied.  
  
"Nasty Boys! Remy is nasty lookin' and Pietro likes boys!" This earned John a stern look from Magneto.  
  
"Why not the Hellfire Club?" Magneto asked, looking at his lackies.  
  
"Why?" Piotr asked.  
  
"Because, Gambit is from hell, and Pyro likes fire," Magneto explained patiently.  
  
"THAT'S IT MATE!" John cried, jumping up and hugging Magneto tightly.  
  
"Why do I get a bad feeling about this?" Piotr asked no one.  
  
"When I was little, my mum used to make me go to church." Remy and Piotr rolled their eyes. Not a story. "And I used to HATE it. And I mean hate it! I wanted to burn that place down! Well, then I became one of those guys that light the candles on the alter. And I accidentally knocked one of them down. The fire engulfed the whole church. Luckily, everyone got out of the church alive, but mate, ooh boy! That was when I discovered my true calling, my powers!" John grinned happily.  
  
"He burned down a church?" Remy whispered to Piotr. "Coulda' sworn that he burned down a marijuana field."  
  
"Does this have a relevancy to it?" Erik asked annoyed.  
  
"Yes! Do you know what those guys were called?"  
  
"Fire fighters?" Magneto quipped, causing Piotr and Remy to chuckle.  
  
"No! Man, they were the acolytes!"  
  
"No! That is possibly the worst name ever! A team named after people who light candles at church! I'm Jewish!" Magneto roared.  
  
"Well, I like it," Piotr said.  
  
"Remy can live with it."  
  
"No, no, no, no and no! My word is final!"  
  
"Then we could always be the Super Duper Cool Guys!"  
  
"I think I finally see how Charles feels..." Magneto moaned, placing his head in his hands.  
  
**[1] Referring to how the color red is associated with communists, being associated with Russia, being associated with Piotr. Blame it on Social Studies! I can't wait till school's out!**


End file.
